Wednesday, July 02, 2008

I wish I knew how it would feel to be free

It's a bad day. I'm sitting in the library, staring at a computer screen, staring at my notes, my hands, my books, wondering what the point is. Today my brain feels fuzzy, my throat hurts. I feel unreal, as if everything I can see is an illusion, a mirage my hands would slip through if I tried to grasp it.

When will this end? When will I feel real again? When will the sun shine?

4 comments:

Amrita said...

You will Becki you will. You are a child of god and He has not forsaken you.

I will be praying for you.

Amrita said...

I 'm sorry I just have to ask you.You are feeling down because you are physically tired or is it that you are hurting inside.

PJ said...

Hi Becki - above the clouds the sun is still shining, and it won't be cloudy forever. If strangers like me, who just drop by your blog now and again, feel concerned for you - how much more the Lord who has loved you from eternity? I've been through a few overcast days myself, and I'll be praying He will blow the clouds away soon and let you bathe in the warmth and light of His love. It's still there and it never fails, like the sun shining even above the clouds, even the other side of the earth when we are in night. Even the Lord Jesus knew a time when the sun was hidden from Him: He understands.

God bless.

Pig wot flies said...

Thanks PJ.

Amrita, it's both, really. I am tired most of the time and sad. Not because of any one cause, lots of factors. Such is the nature of depression.